Get a Relationship “Spot”

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It’s something we have all either asked for because we needed it or given to someone else. It’s a part of proper gym etiquette. It gives support and helps people push through the repetitions of their workout in the weight room and the roadblocks in their heads. What is it? It’s a SPOT, BRO!!

Spotting puts safety first and encourages you to positively persist. However, the greatest spotter I believe a man can have is not an iron brother named Joey, Franky, Paulie, or Vinny. It’s a loving woman who supports your passion for physical fitness. Like challenging workouts in the gym, life can, and will, throw up roadblocks with resistance in our world. To have a dedicated, delightful diva by your side lifting your spirits and truly believing in you is a gorgeous gift from above!

Jason Calabrese & Kai

Jason Calabrese & Kai

I’m not trying to earn brownie points or tick ex-girlfriends off. However, my girlfriend, Kai, has that magic! It’s an overall connection, holistically. Like all couples, we have our ups and downs, but this woman is a keeper, so I would love to share with you some of our moments to encourage you in your life with a swolemate. We are inviting you into our home, to take a behind the scenes look at our everyday lives. We aren’t better than you – I learned long ago we are all equal and special, no matter what looks different on the outside. The goal of this article is for fit couples to get some new ideas that I know will strengthen the foundation of your relationships.

Tip #1 – Connect Emotionally

The alarm goes off at 4:15am, as I prepare to start the day training numerous clients until the evening. Before I leave each morning, I make sure to tell Kai verbally that I love her and physically have her feel a warm kiss and hug. I can guarantee when you walk outside your door to your car, you will release positive energy instantly. That’s more important than a morning cup of coffee!

Jason Calabrese & Kai

Jason Calabrese & Kai

Tip #2 – Connect Mentally

Couples communicate today more through text than phone. Besides the normal generic texts, we send positive vibes throughout the day, typing words of encouragement to one another. This is extremely important because, when those roadblocks do pop up, then we are better prepared to take the hard test life gives us. A mentor spoke to me one time reminding me that the test actually comes first, then the lesson afterwards. The test is making the time for training, nutrition, and supplementation a priority when roadblocks or obstacles make it look impossible. Spousal support is so important in times of decision. Take for example my last week of contest prep in Mississauga, Canada. I was visiting Kai while she was doing some intense job training for a delicious Middle Eastern restaurant called Paramount Fine Foods. I didn’t go for vacation but to spend time with Kai. Unfortunately, it wasn’t a pleasant week for me. I only trained, read and ate tons of chicken. Long story short, my stress levels were going through the roof as those obstacles kept popping up. Truly, I almost tapped out and threw away 16 weeks of dieting, until Kai stopped me. She reminded me who I was, what I have accomplished already, and simply saved me from making a bad decision.

Tip #3 – Connect Physically

They say couples that train together, stay together, so grab some workouts together, indoors or outdoors. Whether it’s in the weight room or doing cardio, it’s productive time spent well together and helps you bond over a shared interest. Due to different work schedules, Kai and I don’t train together all the time, but the athletic time apart makes those muscle toning moments mean much more.

Jason Calabrese & Kai

Jason Calabrese & Kai

Tip #4 – Connect to Cook

In the kitchen, we do have some simple guidelines. Nutrition plans may vary, but there is organization behind our buff buffet! We either take turns cooking for each other or making everything through teamwork, and we take turns with dishwashing duties afterwards. It’s quality time spent together, and it makes things go faster and more smoothly.

Tip #5 – Have a Date Night

Speaking of food, I encourage you to have and keep a date night. Pick an evening you both have free on a regular basis and fill it with entertainment and a favorite food place to enjoy. The benefits are so rewarding! You and your significant other will be spending time relaxing and enjoying one another’s company while you also shock the body for the better with a planned cheat meal. Your food cravings are satisfied safely, without disastrous splurges, and you’ll appreciate your nights out looking and feeling great at a whole new level that can carry over straight to the bedroom. But, that’s for a whole other article!

I’m convinced these tips make for a better, healthier, closer relationship. I’m not Dr. Phil or Jerry Springer, but if you need a complimentary couples’ consultation, we are both available to assist.


One last tip for the Guys: When you go grocery shopping for the fuel you put in your tank, stop by the floral section and pick out flowers for your woman that catch your eye. She will feel your love, and you’ll capture her heart!

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